Crush, kill, destroy
Stress will deploy
Stretch, fill the void
with what fits
What’s for sale?
What’s it feel?
What’s bliss?
Just a pill
Big to swallow but I did
Took a serotonin loan out
I’m still paying off my debt
You were holding me in bed
Hoped I’d wake to see tomorrow
Half happened, never slept
This past life I recollect
Take me back or keep me here
Just don’t skip too far ahead
Cuz right now I’m blessed
But shit is not always like this
Never had it all, more’s missing
We grieving who isn’t here
And what’s disappearing through the mist
I missed you, my mystery
My misuse, my misery companion
We are now what the next moment abandons
Once again, we’ll go from strangers
To the closest it can get
Don’t leave me stranded

But damn it’s hard to feel special
When you’re so cold sometimes
Sometimes you make me feel special
Worthy of this life

It’s hard to feel special
When you’re so cold sometimes
Sometimes I want to feel special
Worthy to have survived

So this is guilt
This has built
This has grown
This will wilt
Take me home
Stitch a quilt
Like my mother for her sister
Then her mother, then her father
I use words. I’m no author
I use notes, it’s no opera
Skip the drama of the scene
These days
I barely wanna be seen
Masked up
If I don’t make you feel seen
Then that sucks
Guess I’m just playing God
Made these songs in my image
Who’d a thought?

I know it’s hard to feel special
When I’m so cold sometimes
Sometimes you want to feel special
With your right to opine
Go ahead